Evolutionary baggage or common sense

 The goals for row80 are at the end of this post just scroll down.

All good things have to end and so I’m back from a weekend away.  Not a holiday! A working trip, to research – yeah right:)  at the beginning of the week it promised heavy rain and high winds :)  a boat trip on the high seas for a landlubber such as myself, this sounded grim.  Was I even fit enough for three days of traipsing around taking notes and drinking in the atmosphere?  Was the whole idea the stupidest of the year?

Life and writing are so intertwined – I have have come close to cancelling many times throughout the summer as my health plummeted and the fight against depression and what’s the point-ism threatened to engulf – then there was the matter of whether Blue Moons actually deserved this extra research, was it just an indulgence to think I could turn it into something richer/deeper, maybe better to just leave it alone.  This was the usual insecure brain sticking its oar in, meddling and trying to bring me down.  We all know this side of the  brain, yes?- I won’t let it win:)

Is it a good sign that insecurity stalks us? Is it like actors sometimes say – the minute you are not scared you have lost it. Why would it be good? A nice piece of evolutionary baggage? Or sound common sense? I dunno – all I know is I get tired kicking it back into the corner and worry one day it will come to stay for ever.


The weekend was great, the weather good, the company fun and the food (one has to research the food:) splendid – I have so eaten too much! I have absorbed the ambience, rode the seven seas – well the harbour anyway, and developed a couple more strands of Blue Moons.  Successful all around.  Notes and doodles abounding.  Shame to have to return, but I returned with a spanking spring-cleaned brain ready to sit up after weeks of no writing to speak of  and begin again. So kicked insecurity back into the corner this time!

Although the sky looked like this as we set off – heavy with rain and disaster.

It turned to this as we wandered around.    Gloriously beautiful:)

With a great deal of help I even managed to get in and out of the tiny boat (well I thought it was tiny – six people max? that’s not a boat, it’s a nutshell!! I maybe a Limey but I am no sailor! We had an African Queen moment as the boatman (such a nice fellow) had to push and pull us through the narrow reed beds.  No leeches tho’. I forgot my wrist bands and ginger pills ( to my alarm) but for the first time in a long lifetime I was not sea-sick (has to be a good omen of something?)

ROW80: 4th Round Goals:

Blue Moon of course isn’t the WIP that needs to be finished first but I have enough atmosphere now to click away at it in the background.

I thought I had switched Ancestors Tale off  in my brain while I was away, now I discover it was on hibernate only and has been running silently in the background and has welcomed my attention back with a couple of sparkling new scenes – yeah:)

I haven’t yet had the results of all those tests back yet so health-wise still not sorted therefore this round’s goals will have to be fairly minimal, and very flexible.  I am not putting time or word constraints on any part of my creative life this round, for the first time since I began writing back in 2009 – feels very strange:)

1) Writing: I shall continue working on The Ancestors Tale and the short stories for Purple Turtle, as and when I can

I have 60000 words for Blue Moons already in the bag so it can idle a little until the end of the year.

I would still like to attempt NaNoWrMo this year but have accepted that unless there is a drastic improvement I may well fail to finish, but there will be the beginnings of either a fantasy tale or a creation myth and that will be more than there is now.

2)  Blogging: Again when and as I can.  I would like to do more Red Carpet Days – so if any of you are planning book tours or just want to spotlight your books please let me know – I belong to five tribes now and so the post will be shared quite well among a lot of twitter accounts.

3)  Workshops: Couldn’t participate as fully as I would have liked last round but have all the notes and am busy reading them. Quite a lot of deep editing.  There are a couple of savvy workshops this round I am booked in for. I hope to catch up this round – if not it will be my Christmas task.

4)  Continue with my reading challenges which have gone so well this year with all the free time I have had imposed on me – so silver linings all around.

This Week: To begin the round and for this week and the next I wish

1) To finish The Storyteller’s Tale trailer and get it uploaded.

2) To finish the book cover for the new short story book – here’s where I’m at the moment with the cover

I need somehow to draw in a dragon at the bottom to blend in with the mountains – not sure if I can, not good at drawing so fingers crossed.

The rest is tidy up e-mails, awards, lists, reviews etc on all sites I belong to.

I hope everyone had a good break and has arrived back with a spring in their step. All the best.

23 thoughts on “Evolutionary baggage or common sense

  1. Julie Glover says:

    How lovely to hear that your trip went well! Love the gorgeous pic. It sounds like it was well worth the effort for you. Best wishes on tackling those goals!

  2. Gloria Weber says:

    Seems you are being wise in your goals. I wish you the best with your health and them. And have fun doing the trailer and cover. (At least I find those sorts of things fun.)

  3. Samantha says:

    Oh wow! Those are a lot of goals compared to the two I have :P I really like what you have so far with cover! I can’t wait to see it when you’re finished. Best of luck to you for the rest of this week :)

    Writing Through College

    • alberta says:

      Thanks – still have to tackle the matter of a dragon:( not sure how many goals I will get done this round -energy flucuates hourly at moment but some will get there:) best of luck to you as well.

  4. I find there are two types of insecurity. There’s the type that is totally self-defeatist. “I can’t do this. This may work work someone, but it’s not going to work for me.” THen there is the uncomfortable type. “Gosh, look at all the people here. Everyone I look at is a famous writer, and I’m just a wannabe.” “I’m blogging like I know what I’m talking about but i don’t feel it, really.” The first type is often (NOT ALWAYS, and I do understand, believe me, that depression is a real and devastating thing) overcome by simple forward motion. For example, you can’t write a book. But you can write a sentence. Just keep writing sentences. Your house is a disaster (mine is!), and you have no idea what to do. You can’t even get started. But you CAN make your bed (even if you have to knock all the stuff on it off on the floor!). Teeny tiny steps. A book is written a sentence at a time. A house is cleaned one bit of clutter at a time.

    The second type of insecurity, to me, seems like a challenge. “Look at all these published writers! What do I have to contribute?” Well, I make myself have something to contribute. It is very uncomfortable at first, but I push myself out of my comfort zone, and, while being myself, just force myself to believe that I AM good enough to be one of these people, and one day, I will be one.

    Good luck with NaNo. Try it! What’s the worst that can happen? You write a couple words. It’s more words than you had at the beginning of the month! Or, you write no words. If you didn’t try, you wouldn’t have words anyway. So there’s nothing to lose!

    • alberta says:

      It’s the 2nd really and it is always about just doing – sometimes I amaze myself at how far away from that comfort zone I have wandered over the past couple of years – I managed NaNo last year (that was the story I was researching at the weekend – the bigger better version!) enjoyed it very much – been ill this summer tho so energy levels are low low low – but I will join in because its fun and who knows what will be acheived:) thanks for the luck – will you be there?:)

  5. I always say to people, who cares if you on,y did 10,000 words for Nano this year, it’s 10,000 (or whatever figure) words more than you had last month! ;)

    Good luck honey!


    • alberta says:

      Thanks – it will be hard because I do like to finish what I start (I never put down a book I have started for instance however much I don’t enjoy it:( so saying NaNo doesnt matter if I dont finish is a truely new thing for me!

  6. Kate C. says:

    Holy Moses, you have a lot of balls in the air right now! Good luck with all that writing.

    I tried to do Nano Camp over the summer, but my son wasn’t sleeping and I discovered that sleep is a necessary component to writing, so that went right out the window. As much as I love Nano, and I DO, I think it will be a few years before I can participate again.

    Like when my kids are in school. hahaha
    Good Luck with your goals!

  7. S. J. Maylee says:

    Hi, Alberta. It’s been forever since I was here. Good to catch up with all that you’ve been up to and I always love it when you include pics. Great stuff. I’m still working on my strategy for this round, I hope to have it figured out in time for Sunday’s post. I hear the spring in your step, hope you have a fab round.

  8. Ryan King says:

    I’m glad that your trip turned out well and that you didn’t get sea sick. Insecurity is natural. I know we get tired of it but that’s what challenges us. If we didn’t have it, why would we try harder?

    As and when you can is perfectly fine. If it nets you more words or blog posts, then you’ve won. Simple as that. Best of luck :)

    • alberta says:

      I was anxious about the boat trip as well – seasickness has been the bane of my life – as traveler who lives on an island its been the proverbial pain! so always took something – maybe I didn’t need too after all – throw of ones shackles is the name of the game I guess:)

  9. Rebecca Bradley says:

    Your trip sounds absolutely wonderful and even the photo that is supposed to be the not so good image, looks fabulous. I can see how you managed to make lots of notes for atmosphere for your work.

    It sounds as though you are really addressing your health and writing sensibly. Do what you can, when you can, because it’s all about enjoying it. :)

    • alberta says:

      I would like to say the sensible bit is from a natural patient nature however I confess I am bein sensible because even I can see there is no alternative – even I learn eventually:) the photos are not as good as the real thing but do portray it somewhat – fantastic notes

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s